Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I'm Sarah. Way too often.

I was reading the story of Abraham and Sarah yesterday. If you're not familiar with it, here it is in a very simple nutshell:

God promised Abraham and Sarah that their offspring would be numberless and that God would bless them. But, Sarah was unable to bear children. They tried and tried but she never got pregnant. So they decided to take the matter into their own hands and Abraham took  their servant to be his second wife. They figured that way she could get pregnant and have their children that the Lord promised. In their eyes, this was the only way offspring would be possible. So he slept with her, she got pregnant, they had a son. But the problem was, this was not God's will for them. This wasn't the way He said they would have a child. But Abraham and Sarah saw "no other way" and tried to fix it with a human solution, instead of trusting God. Anyway... years later, Sarah was 99 years old and Abraham was in his 100's... needless to say, WAY past child-bearing years. And God told them that this time next year, Sarah would have a son.

Sarah laughed and actually got a little sassy with God. She was pretty much like, "Oh, yeah... now that I'm old and worn out you're saying I'm going to have a kid??? Yeah right, God!"

But God's response to her struck me. Look at the end of this story:

Then the LORD said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really have a child, now that I am old?’  Is anything too hard for the LORD? I will return to you at the appointed time next year, and Sarah will have a son.”

Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh.”

But he said, “Yes, you did laugh.”

At first when I read that I was like, "Dang, Sarah!" You know that awkward feeling when you're in the presence of a dad getting onto his kid? That's what I felt like when I was reading that. I wanted to be like, "Sarah... you're crazy! How dare you smart off to God like that! How dare you laugh at him!"

But then I read it again and a question entered my mind...

How many times has God asked that very thing about me?

"Why did Jordan laugh and say, 'Really, God???' Is anything too hard for the Lord?"

I can hear it. And it makes me weak inside to think about. I've been Sarah. So many times. When God has put a vision in my heart to do something and it sounds great and all, but really I'm thinking, "Yeah right, God." Or when I'm sitting in church and there's a lesson about restoration and I think about a particular relationship in my life that God wants to restore. And I think to myself, yeah... that would be great. Sounds great. But... yeah right. That's impossible.

I wonder how many times God has wanted to just grab my face, look me in the eye, and say, "Child... WHY are you laughing at this? WHY are you doubting? Is ANYTHING too hard for me?? Don't you remember where I've brought you? What I've done? What I've made? What I've restored? What I CAN do?"

Some days I just have to get on my knees and say, "I'm sorry, Lord. I'm so sorry for my little faith. Please, help me believe. Help me remember."

Yesterday was one of those days.

He is so faithful. NOTHING is impossible for Him.

Let's live like we believe that. 


1 comment:

Rebekah said...

Whoa. Needed that.

Like. For real.

Thanks for sharing J!